** Last Weekend **

My brother (we'll call him Hippy) graduated last weekend. As is typical of many colleges, it happens to be a fairly liberal campus. In fact, there were several grads wearing birkenstocks, and hemp necklaces, you get the picture. I love to tease these people. It gives me satisfaction to watch them squirm. It's not that i don't respect their opinions, some of them i readily agree with, but they seem to be less tolerant of others' views than they would otherwise have you think. It's a bit ironic really. (Yes i'm generalizing, i know. Get over it.)
Picture this. I have a goatee, glasses, long curly hair, and when i don't brush it i tend to look a little "hippy". My political views, however, are decidedly conservative. Hippy, on the other hand has become the consumate liberal, yet has cropped hair, clean cut, and looks remarkably conservative. We like to joke that when we visit each other, we can go "undercover" in each other's worlds.
Not this time. I wanted to push some buttons this weekend. I wore this shirt and got some pretty good scowls and fake smiles. It was wonderful.

Skip to Saturday:
After the ceremony, we drove down to the folks house. They live out in the desert. Way out there. Recently my mom bought a horse, and my dad bought a donkey to keep him company. (My dad has this weird sense of humor and named his donkey Murphy, after Shrek's "donkey.") Anyway it's out there. My other brother (we'll call him Crash) wanted to take the quad down to the river with my cousin. In this particular area it's not legal to ride tandem so they decided to get some neighbor kids to go down with them on their dirt bikes. Crash wanted to ride a bike down so he borrowed one from the kids. As you might have guessed, he's not what you'd call an experienced rider. I'd call him a shitty rider, but that's me, i'm his brother, i'm supposed to say things like that to him. So Crash gets on the bike, revs the throttle and says, "It seems like it's running a little quick." He then proceeds to let out the clutch in one quick motion. The bike lurches out from under him, kicking out the back tire to the right and then it grabs pulling him back over. He gets his foot caught under the peg, launches and rolls. The father of the neighbor kids is watching this trying not to laugh and says, "Good thing to just get it out of the way now." HE HADN'T EVEN GOT OUT OF THE YARD! I can't believe they let him go. Now his heel is all bruised and he keeps complaining about having to walk on it. It takes all i've got not to tell him how stoopid he is. But he already knows.